What is Your Story?
“The most powerful therapeutic process I know is to contribute to rich story development.”
-Michael White
The narrative that you have about our life has a direct impact on how you feel and how you behave. For example, if you walk around telling yourself that your life is pointless, then you may feel unmotivated, discouraged, or depressed. If you believe drugs and alcohol are performance enhancers, you are more likely to abuse those substances. Addicts have some of the most creative narratives that maintain their addictive behaviors.
What is the story that you tell yourself about your own life? The challenge is to create a narrative that inspires you and is realistic and rational. My suggestion is to write down your story, to be the author of your own life. Here are some questions that you can start asking yourself to help you get started:
What gives your life meaning?
What are some challenges, difficulties, and hardships that you’ve overcome or are working to overcome? How can what you learned help others?
What gifts do you bring?
How do you want to make others feel?
What verb best describes you?
If you had to teach something, what would you teach?
What makes you smile?
Who inspires you the most? What qualities do they possess that inspire you?
Over the last 6 months, when have you felt the most alive and electrified?
What kind of conversations do you have with your closest friends?
What are your deepest values?
What would you regret not doing, being, or having in your life?
What are the biggest things you have learned in your life so far?
Writing your own story probably sounds like a lot of work. You may notice some resistance or you may think it’s a good idea, but you procrastinate actually doing it. As someone who has written his own story hundreds of times in his life, I can tell you that each time you do it, you learn something new about yourself. It’s an amazing experience. It will directly impact how you view your place in the world. If you notice a strong negative theme in your story, a good step is to get support from others or from a therapist. They can help you put a positive spin on a thin narrative that may be oppressively be keeping you down.